Greg’s Realm VI: Øn the Gø (Pt. 1)


If someone ever asks you to participate in a Backstreet Boys lip sync for a talent show lead by a bunch of people you can’t understand, ALWAYS say yes. But we’ll get there.

Oh, hi by the way. LONG TIME NO SEE. I’ll go ahead and say the obvious: you missed me this past half month since the last Greg’s Realm. I get it, don’t worry. I’m sorry. You can stop crying now. Seriously, chill. Why? BECAUSE I’M BACK.

Life has been busy, so let’s dive right into it.

While you were all being wholesome losers with your families celebrating Thanksgiving like a normal human, I said a thicc “SHALOM, I’M OUT” to mine and hopped on a plane to the SECOND most Insta-worthy country (can’t beat Iceland, as we all know from my previous trip.) I went to a place where it’s #FjordsOnFjordsOnFjords, where eating reindeer is the norm (and it’s delicious, full disclosure,) where the people are so introverted I’m surprised I wasn’t detained at customs. Yes, I’m talking about Norway.

My final destination was Trondheim, a city located smack-center of the country, in order to visit my friend Marcus at his folkehogskole (I genuinely don’t know how to explain what kind of institution that is since it mainly only exists in Scandinavia, so please google it.) However, my journey began in Bergen, the country’s second biggest city, because I like to live the #8HourLayoverLyfe (not really, but money and logistics sometimes clash, just like when MJ tries to dress up Captain for a photoshoot.)

Bergen is interesting to say the least. From facing a brief whiteout on top of Mt. Fløyen, to visiting the city’s famous marina, to eating at Kygo’s favorite burger joint and ordering his favorite burger (shoutout to Inside Burger Café, highly recommend it if you’re ever there,) it’s fair to say I got to briefly experience the life of a Bergenite (not sure if that’s correct, but it’s not coming up underlined as red, so we’ll roll with it.) Also, side note, the hail there is INSANE. I have never seen it rain such large pellets of solid ice in my entire life. It looked as if someone poured white beads across the entire city once the storm passed. Don’t be me, take an umbrella if you ever go.

After shuttling back to the airport and hopping on a quick one-hour flight, I finally had landed in Trondheim. Upon being picked up by Marcus and his other classmates, Mats and Gustav, he explained that it was imperative that I be immersed back into Norwegian culture since my last time there. That being said, we went straight to Ikea to do Christmas shopping (or in Norwegian, jule shopping.) Besides everything being ridiculously expensive because #socialism, I was able to cop a hot dog at checkout (also, first time eating at Ikea!)

Once we finished mazing through the gigantic superstore, we drove back to Rødde, a suburb of Trondheim, and the location of Marcus’ folkehogskole. I knew my time in Rødde was short since I arrived Thursday evening and planned leaving Monday afternoon, so I had to make the most of it.

Okay, pause the story. Let’s teleport for a moment to the present day to a magical place called the SAC 24-hour study room. It’s 3AM, it’s also #FinalsSZN, and there’s a strong zombie vibe going on in my head. So with that being said…


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Orange Umbrella